Meet the children

I've posted pictures of my children before, but I'd like to introduce them properly.

Here's Maya, my first born, age 4 ("almost five", I hear her say)

This cheeky little lady is Lily, age 2

And here's the little man, Benjamin, eight and a half bonny, bouncy months.

I don't want this blog to be about my insomnia, the fact that since I had children I stopped sleeping (yes, even those nights when there's not a peek out of any of them), but I'm afraid sometimes it seeps so deeply into my existence that it will be impossible not to mention it here. I know that being creative, doing things I truly value like writing, provide a lifeline for me and it's a way to lift myself out of the blues that I sometimes grapple with.

But looking at these pictures of my kids, I know how very, very lucky I am to have three such happy, healthy little people in my life.

Diamonds in my diary

Where does my creative life fit around perpetually-knackered-mother-of-three-under-five? Sleep has the habit of eluding me (I've charted this ad nauseum in Notes of an Insomniac mother) and I often wonder how? where? when? can I write. I got so excited about going back to work on my novel, but realistically, here I am grabbing five minutes to blog, standing up to type whilst the children are munching their way through snacks (like an egg-timer, the second the final crumb is gobbled up, my peace will evaporate)....so when will I really be able to spend the time I need to work on my novel? And even if I do find the time, will I have enough energy?

And I know, I know, this time will come. And I need to just remain in the present and enjoy my gorgeous children. But sometimes it all just feels overwhelming when I'm so exhausted and sleep-deprived and I feel like I'd like to go into hibernation for a year or twenty.

BUT, here's the good news. Over the past week or so I have unexpectedly reconnected with diary writing. I have kept a diary for almost thirty years (blimey) but it has always been sporadic, depending on what's happening in my life and how much time I'm spending blogging, for example. But last week I started a new diary and hit upon a different approach: rather than my normal recording of events and feelings, I decided to write three things each day that made me smile, or that I felt proud of myself about, or that I felt really positive about. It may sound like a strange thing to do, but on the days I feel low and exhausted (not to mention frustrated at my perceived lack of creativity meted out to my children and myself), it's helpful to remind myself that I can always find small diamonds of laughter, happiness and creativity, even on the toughest and roughest of days.

Friction Magazine

Click here to see the short piece I had accepted by Friction Magazine recently. I wrote this story for a creative writing evening class a few years back in which we had to write a piece from two differing viewpoints. Reading back over it now, there are several things I'd change, including the title! But still, it feels great to have something published.